A time for all things

I just spent 2 weeks in New York with my in-laws. My 93 year-old father-in-law was dying in the hospital and the family was doing as much as possible to provide support, as my 79 year-old mother-in-law spent every day, all day in the hospital. I spent the 4 of the first 5 days in the hospital. The off day was spent upstate with the brother-in-law and his menagerie. My father-in-law passed just before Jewish Shabbat, finally getting some peace after 2 months in the hospital attached to the cold, impersonal tools of medicine.

If you don't have a living will, write one up today. Mine is nothing fancy:

Do not resuscitate if quality of life implies permanent unconscious state or persistent vegetative state
Do not keep alive if this requires extraordinary medical support
If in doubt, pull the plug

Lots of people flew in for the funeral, which happens asap. I was very glad that both my kids made it in time. Then the family 'sits Shiva' for a week and gets some closure.

Most of my time when I visit NY is taken up with family and making sure I see all the grandkids, nieces and nephews. I try to clear off at least one full day for myself. This trip was for 2 weeks, so I got in 2 full "New York" days. I also got in a bit of running and many, many kilometers of walking. As usual, I ate more than required and drank a fair bit of beer.

My 'New York' days go like this: up and out the door before 6:00 AM, breakfast in the city at my latest diner (currently the Seinfield diner at Broadway and 112th St., formerly the Roxy on John St. down by the World Trade site). Absorb a local paper and mucho coffee. Start the ongoing vigil for access to bathrooms (parks, fast-food places, bars, big book and grocery stores). I do a LOT of walking (8-10 hours worth), a little shopping, maybe a museum and for sure a few parks. Lunch involves pizza or pastrami and a beer, as does supper. I almost always get to either the East River or the Hudson, Times Square and Washington Park, As well, I almost always take in a concert or ball game and return to Queens after midnite.

This trip, I got to see Amadou & Miriam at Webster Hall. It was an amazing show. A husband and wife from Mali, both blind. I missed them when I was in Dublin in 2006 (all sold out, I hung around for hours trying to get a rush seat), so bought the ticket early in the day. I chose this over baseball at the new Yankee stadium.

I finally got to walk the new High Line elevated park in the meat-packing district of Manhattan. This made me very happy indeed. I have been following its development for years. It is a good example of what really talented people can do with a public space. New York is filled with so many beautiful parks. Another new one for me this trip was Morningside just above Central Park.

I also got to see game 7 of the hockey finals (yea Pittsburgh) by dropping into my brother-in-law's firehouse in the Bronx. Dropping in is a bit of a misnomer. It took 1.5 hours to get there and more than 2 hours to get back. This also meant that I missed getting to a baseball game this trip and both teams had new stadiums. Such is life.

An emotionally draining trip. Good to see so much family, altho the occasion was a sad one.